The destructive and hurtful behaviors are a reaction to deep emotional pain. In other words, theyre not about you. When your loved one does or says something hurtful towards you, understand that the behavior is motivated by the desire to stop the pain they are experiencing; its rarely deliberate.

Does borderline personality disorder mean you are violent?

In an area characterized by considerably less research, empirical evidence indicates that individuals with borderline personality disorder may exhibit physical violence toward partners, physical violence toward known but nonintimate individuals, criminal behaviors that embody externalized violence (e.g., property